


we gladiate (but i guess we're really fighting ourselves)

by taakos



Series: money, power, glory [8]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Grand Theft Auto Setting, Blood Loss, Blood and Gore, Blood and Violence, Canon-Typical Violence, Explicit Language, Fake AH Crew, Guilt, Gun Violence, Trans Female Character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-27
Updated: 2015-07-27
Packaged: 2018-04-11 15:34:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4441418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/taakos/pseuds/taakos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is just the beginning. </p><p>(Oh, but the end always comes.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	we gladiate (but i guess we're really fighting ourselves)

**Author's Note:**

> title and chapter names from Glory and Gore by Lorde

There are many, many banks in Los Santos. Many of those banks get robbed. A good percentage of them, really. So, for the Fake AH Crew's first heist, Geoff decides to rob a bank. ('Cause why not?)

"Alright. Jack," Geoff nods to her. Jack raises her glass of wine. 

"Boys." He nods to the rest of them. "This first heist is going to be the best." He points to the map on the table.

Gavin raises his hand. Geoff sighs. "Yes, Gavvers?"

"What time are we eating dinner tonight?"

Geoff's left eye begins to twitch rhythmically. "I don't know. Shut up! This is heist time!"

"Well you don't need to be so damn rude about it." Gavin mumbles. Michael punched Gavin in the shoulder. Gavin squawks and shoots Michael a hurt look. Michael smirks and gives him the middle finger.

"As I was saying: This first heist is going to be the best. We're robbing a bank." Geoff stops and waits for the shock and awe. It doesn't come. His shoulders slump.

"Okay...? Is that it? Is that the entire plan? Just rob a bank?" Ryan says, raising one (perfect) eyebrow. His index finger runs around the rim of his Diet Coke.

"What do you mean 'just rob a bank'?!" Geoff squawks indignantly. His eye begins twitching again. (Michael snickers quietly. Geoff turns and glares at him. Michael smiles sweetly at him.)

"Seems a bit, I 'unno, plain?" Ryan shrugs and sips on his Diet Coke.

"That is a bit plain, yeah," Gavin nods and scratches his cheek. 

"That is a bit plain, yeah," Geoff mimics in a high pitched, horrible version of Gavin's accent and voices. Gavin thins his lips as Michael and Ray giggle. Jack scoffs and hides a smile. 

"All I'm saying is that, maybe, we could do something more than just rob a bank. It's just a bit tacky," Ryan admits, still running his finger around the rim of his drink. 

Geoff's face goes from annoyed to frustrated. He pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs roughly. "Okay, well, since Ryan thinks my idea is shit, does anyone else have one?"

Ray raises his hand. "We should rob two banks." 

Ryan snaps his fingers and points at him. "Yeah! Let's do that!"

Geoff's face falls and he walks to the couch Jack sits on. He dramatically flops down onto it, butt first, and groans. Jack laughs and pats his shoulder, "There, there." 

Ryan jumps up, taking Geoff's place in front of the table. He pulls a marker out of god knows where. 

Ray's eyebrows come together, "Where the fuck di—" 

Ryan's blue eyes slide to him. "Don't worry about it." His eyes narrow slightly. Ray's eyes widen and he looks away.

"Okay. What two banks are we gonna rob?" Ryan asks, eyes roaming the map.

Michael looks up from his phone. "There's those two banks near Las Lagunas Boulevard. They're maybe, I 'unno, two, three streets apart?"

Ryan pinpoints the two on the map and uncaps his marker. He circles them. "Okay, so, we'll need to split into two teams probably!" (Ryan gets enthusiastic about few things. Heisting, of course, is one of those things.)

"We should do youngest and oldest, so like me, you," Jack nods toward Ryan, "and Geoff on one, and Michael, Ray, and Gav on the other." 

Gavin's face breaks into a wide, sharp grin. "Team Gents and Team Lads!" 

Jack's eyebrows rise, "You've been waiting for this, haven't you?" Her tone is amused.

"No?" Gavin says as innocently as possible, looking away from Jack's gaze. 

Jack shakes her head and smiles. (Gavin may or may not have planned this since the first day the entire crew was present. May or may not have.)

Ryan divides up two separate routes, both of them meeting up at Geoff's building's garage. Ryan looks up from the map and forward to the crew.

"Hopefully the cops will give up after a couple minutes of chasing us and we'll be able to get back without them following us." A beat passes. "Hopefully." 

Geoff groans quietly. His hands are covering his face and his words are muffled. "Oh god, this is gonna suck." 

Jack pats him on the shoulder again. "It won't suck if Gavin does what he's supposed to do."

Gavin opens and closes his mouth multiple times, too offended to even find the right words. He sighs dejectedly and nods slowly, "That's pretty accurate, yeah."

|

"Masks, Ryan? Really?" Michael asks incredulously. (Michael's accent made "Ryan" sound like "Rye-an", rather than the actual pronunciation.)

"Yes, masks! Masks are good! Customizable, fun, intimidating! All the things you would want in a heist!" Ryan's enthusiasm was beginning to get a bit unsettling. (It's been unsettling, let's be honest.)

"We can color coordinate!" Geoff shouts, a strangely excited grin spreads across his face. (Who the fuck gets excited about color coordination? Oh, yeah, Geoff does!)

Michael's face falls and he sighs. "Jesus, fuck," he mutters under his breath.

So, Ryan calls his masks guy at Vespucci Movie Masks and Memorabilia on Vitrus. He orders Bone Skull masks in black, which costs a pretty penny. The shop normally doesn't carry them in black, but Ryan negotiates. The guy, "Fred" as Ryan calls him, delivers the masks to Geoff's apartment. (Geoff pays for them, so the cost doesn't really matter anyway.)

Gavin manages to close a clothing store for an hour to get them clothes for the heist. "The manager owed me one." He shrugs lazily.

So, they climb into their vehicles and drive down to the store. The parking is perhaps, not the best, and Ray may or may not have chipped the store's paint. (He really didn't try to, he just didn't stop early enough. Good thing he wore his helmet, though.)

Gavin breezes past the rest of the crew and uses both hands to open the doors. They walk in behind him, obviously inspecting the store. A woman at the register, the manager presumably, sees Gavin. She moves surprisingly quick across the store and hugs him. 

"Gavin! How are you? And who're they?" Her head pops up over his shoulder and peers at the crew. 

Gavin releases her and brushes himself off. "Oh dear, I forgot! Mica, this is the Fake AH Crew!" He gestures widely at them. "Fake AH Crew, this is Mica Burton!" Gavin gesticulates weakly at her.

"Burton? Like, LeVar Burton? Leader of the Rainbow Crew?" Geoff inquires, raising both eyebrows. His mustache moves up a little, too. (Ray muffles a laugh and struggles to keep straight face.)

"Yep, that's my dad!" Mica smiles proudly. 

"So, why are you working at a clothing store?" Michael asks, his arms crossed.

"Girl's gotta have a day-job. I don't spend all my days being a criminal like y'all. That shit's tiring." Mica puts her hands on her hips. Geoff makes a noise of agreement. (That shit is tiring, he should know, he has the gray hairs to prove it.)

"Okay, well," Mica clasps her hands. "You guys can pick and choose some clothes and if you find some you want, use the changing rooms over there!" She gestures generally toward the changing rooms.

"Cheers for this, again, Mica." Gavin smiles genuinely at her. (Ryan notes that Gavin doesn't smile genuinely much. Interesting.)

"Yeah, man, anytime!" She smiles warmly at him and moves back behind the register. 

The crew spends about 50 minutes in the store. Jack gets done first, coming out of the changing rooms decked out in black leather. (She gets an appreciative whistle from Geoff and a thumbs up from Ray. She smiles widely at them and moves to talk to Mica while everyone else finishes up.)

Michael and Ray come out at nearly the same time, both wearing dark jeans, shirts, shoes, and jackets. Instead of the leather jacket that Michael wears, Ray shrugs on a black hoodie. (The hoodie really doesn't help him look particularly more intimidating. Ray's just not an intimidating guy.)

Ryan just hangs out, sitting on the register's desk. He doesn't need to change since he already wears dark clothes. He types furiously, occasionally looking up. (He's managing his stocks. Most of them are up today. Ryan sighs wistfully, thinking about the people he'll have to kill. There goes the murder break.)

While Mica and Jack chat, Geoff walks out of the changing room. He's wearing a tux, with a bow-tie. He's smug, very smug. Ryan picks his head up and chuckles before looking back down.

"Geoff, what the fuck are you wearing?" Michael pipes up from his position on a couch. His feet are propped up on Ray's lap and his head, on the couch's arm. 

"I look snazzy, right?" Geoff wiggles his eyebrows and Jack just sighs. 

"You look outta fuckin' place." Michael countered, looking Geoff in the eye. 

Geoff pouts and mumbles, "I like it." 

Jack shoots Michael a dirty look and he puts his hands up, giving up. 

"Wear what you want, Geoff, you look very spiffy." Jack assures him. Geoff grins wildly, plopping down on a chair diagonal from two-thirds of the Lads. 

Speaking of Lads — "Where's Gav?" Geoff wonders aloud. 

Jack opens her mouth to answer as Gavin pops out of the changing room. Gavin looks like the most pretentious prick in the whole goddamn world. Geoff says this and gets a scoff from the Brit.

"It's true, though," Ray nods. Michael makes an agreeing noise. 

Gavin pouts, "You guys are the worst." He adjusts his collar and jacket. He loses focus for a moment, staring out blankly, but then remembers what he wanted to do. The crew starts getting up and brushing themselves off as Gavin walks up to Mica's register. Mica and Jack say their goodbyes after hugging briefly. 

"Thank you very much for this, Mica. Honestly. It means the world to me." Gavin says in a low, painfully honest voice. (Ryan hears him and ponders it as he walks out the door.)

Gavin meets up with the rest of them outside after thanking Mica and paying her with Geoff's card. He wordlessly hands it back to Geoff, who looks down at it. 

"When did you take that...?" Gavin shrugs and Geoff sighs jaggedly. "You know what, forget it, let's just heist." 

They split into teams, Lads and Gents, respectively. Michael and Gavin climb into Michael's chrome coated Adder. Ray climbs on his pink motorcycle. Jack, Geoff, and Ryan pile into Geoff's bulletproof car. They set off, Gents going in front, Michael and Gavin behind them, and Ray tailing them. 

It takes a bit, but they drive to a nearby warehouse of Geoff's and wait for the Sun go down more. While broad daylight heists are fun, they're also fucking dangerous and stupid. No good. 

Geoff really doesn't want to get shot today, either. He passes out bulletproof vests, guns, and ammo while they wait. Gavin posts Snapmatic pictures while going over the plan once more with Geoff. (Ray cleans Pinkie slowly and meticulously.)

Ryan hooks up the com system minutes before they start. The Sun gets lower at 6 PM and the Fake AH Crew sets out. They speed out into Rockford Hills. The Gents take the bank on Popular Street and the Lads get the one on Las Lagunas. As they arrive, their nervous chatter hushes and they go into heist-mode. 

|

"Everyone have their masks on?" Geoff asks as the Gents near their bank. 

Ray's already parked his bike and is adjusting his shot on the roof across from the Lads' bank. Michael's Adder waits in an alley with him and Gavin in it. He grunts affirmatively, "Ray's already on his rooftop. We're ready whenever, boss." (No one sees it, but Geoff smiles a smidge under his mask. Cute.)

Geoff steels himself as the Gents skid to a stop on Popular. "On my mark, boys," Geoff glances at Ryan and Jack. "Let's heist!" He pushes down his anxiety and manages to say this in his most authoritative voice. (It still cracks, though.)

Ryan and Jack burst through the bank's doors, Ryan already shouting threats. 

"GET ON THE GROUND AND I WON'T HAVE TO KILL ANYONE." He bellows, pointing his semi-automatic at the people near him.

Jack walks past their new hostages and addresses the bank teller calmly. "Don't press the panic button, please. I don't want to have to kill you." Her fingers linger at her sidearm on her thigh as she moves her mask away from her face.

The teller nods frantically and raises her hands in front of herself. She's having a panic attack. (Shit.) She shakes as fast breaths come out of her. "O-okay, w-w-what do you want me to d-d-do?" She stutters.

Jack ignores the shouting she hears behind her from Ryan and Geoff. "Just calm down, first of all. I won't shoot you unless you fuck us. Just don't fuck us, okay? Oh, what's your name?" 

The teller nods and takes a deep breath. "I won't fuck you guys. I promise. And, my name is Raquel."

Jack nods earnestly. "Okay, Raquel," Jack hands her the duffle bag. "I want you to go into the back and fill that bag with as much money as you can. After that, come back, give it to me, and we'll leave. No one will get hurt, not unless you fuck us."

The teller nods and takes the bag. She disappears. Jack shares a firm nod with Geoff. "Boys, how're y'all doin'?" Jack's drawl gets thick. 

|

The Lads are in a bit more of a dangerous situation. "Sec," Michael breathes out as Ray's shots ring out, true and hard. The glass front of the bank is absolutely shattered because of Ray. 

"Uh, well, the cops are here already. Which, uh, sucks. Most of the civilians are dead," Michael sucks in a breath. "Which, uh, also sucks, I guess." He pops his head out from his cover and shoots a cop in between the eyes. 

"What? What the fuck happened?" Jack's voice crackles though the com as Michael risks a glance at Gavin. He's casually chatting to a civilian who survived and is helping him fill the bag. (Fucking idiot.)

"The, uh," Michael's so out of shape. It doesn't help that the bullet caught by his vest almost hit him in the neck. "The teller pressed the fucking panic button," he scoffs and pops up again. Three cops go down before Michael ducks for cover again.

"Right. You and the boys okay?" Jack's worried voice floats out of the com. Jack reminds Michael of his mom. 

"I'm chill." Ray pipes up as he shoots another cop from the roof. He has his hood up. (He looks like he’s twelve.)

"I'm tippy toppers!" Gavin enthuses. (How Gavin is an adult boggles the minds of Michael and Jack. Gavin pays actual taxes. Ugh.)

"Almost took one to the neck, but I'm aight, my vest caught it." Michael chimed in, his shoulder going back with the gun's kick. (He's gonna need so, so much ice later.)

"Alright! Got it!" Gavin chirps all of a sudden. He bursts out of the back and ducks for cover across from Michael. He pulls his pistol from its holster and catches a cop in the thigh. 

"Fucking finally," Michael breathes out. "Ray, you mind covering us?" His eyes flicker toward the roof above them.

"Tell me when," Ray intones.

Michael popped out again and shot a cop just coming in. He ducks once more and looked at Gavin. Gavin gives a smile and a thumbs up. They're good to go. 

"Hey, Jack, tell Geoff we're going." Michael says. Jack gives an affirming grunt. "Lads, on my mark," Michael takes a deep breath and readies himself. "Go, go, go!" 

Bodies start dropping as Ray quickly adjusts himself. Michael and Gavin start sprinting, Gavin taking the lead as Michael throws a grenade to make sure no one would follow them. (Gavin's limping, what the fuck?) 

As the grenade's pin gets pulled, Ray switches Pinkie to safety and straps it onto his back. He slides down the building's ladder and sprints to the alley. 

|

As the Lads escape, Jack is getting impatient. Raquel's taking too long. Shit. Jack shares a look with Geoff. She puts her mask back on and shoots through the glass of the enclosure. She jumps up and over it, eyes searching for Raquel. Jack half-runs to the back where a small vault is kept. 

Jack finds Raquel in seconds, she's not breathing. Probably passed out from the shock of the robbery. "Geoff, am I killing the teller?" Her tone is resigned. 

"It would be best, yeah, but if you don't want to — you don't have to." Geoff murmurs into the com.

Jack sighs and flips Raquel onto her back. A single shot rings out as Jack’s bullet goes through Raquel's forehead. (She fucked us, can't have that.) Jack looks away and spots the bag. 

Jack hurries and fills the bag as much as she can, zipping it and throwing the straps onto her shoulder. "Get ready to move, boys, I've got the bag." 

"Woo, good job, Jack!" Ryan's voice is rougher than usual, probably from all the shouting. Geoff makes a noise, presumably agreeing with Ryan.

Jack meets up with Geoff as Ryan sets explosives. "Had to be done," Geoff admits, his voice apologetic. Jack nods solemnly and hands him the money. They walk out the door and Jack jumps into the driver's seat. An explosion bursts out of the doors of the bank, just as Ryan walks out. 

It's a sight to behold. Entirely and utterly chaos. At least ten people dead, all civilians. The place is on fire and smoking, Jack can hear alarms and sirens in the distance. She swallows and takes off her mask. Geoff does the same as Ryan gets in. 

Jack takes off as Geoff checks in with the Lads. "Everything alright on your end, kids?" 

Gavin's scoff is audible through the com. Geoff chuckles faintly. Ryan breathes out a laugh and shakes his head.

"We're good. Gav got shot in the leg, but other than that, it's good." Ray says through the rev of his motorcycle. 

"Right, radio silence until we met up at the rendezvous." Geoff grunts. Silence becomes them all. (This is the worst part of a heist. The silence, the waiting.)

|

Minutes later, the car stops at Geoff's building's garage and the Gents get out. Gavin sits on the hood of Michael's Adder with the other two Lads next to him. Blood pours out of his leg, spreading into the fabric of his pants like an echo. Gavin's face has pain etched into it. 

Geoff sighs and hands the money to Ryan. "Michael, you mind grabbing Bleedy McBleeds A Lot?" 

Michael nods solemnly and puts Gavin's arm around his neck, walking with him, but really carrying him. The six of them walk into the elevator, a silence enveloping them while it climbs to the top of the building. It dings and Ray jumps, his shoulders going tense. Jack squeezes his shoulder as she walks out of the elevator.

Ray puts the bag of money on Geoff's coffee table, Ryan doing the same. Jack fetches the First Aid Kit from one of the bathrooms as Michael helps Gavin to prop his leg up. Ryan grabs a towel and throws it to Michael. Michael presses it hard against Gavin's entry wound. 

Ryan plops down next to Ray as Jack comes back into the living room. She squats next to Gavin's leg and cleans it as Michael gives Geoff a brief debrief. 

"I didn't know Gav got hit until we got in the car and he starting yelling." Michael explains as Gavin mumbles uselessly. (Michael swears hears something about dinner.) 

Geoff nods and sighs roughly. "Ryan, can you count the cash while Jack fixes up Gavino?"

Ryan nods and clears the dining room table of clutter. He grabs the bags and unzips them. He counts meticulously as the rest of the crew rests, watching and waiting. Jack digs the bullet out of Gavin's leg and tosses it in the garbage. She dresses the wound as blood pours from it. She stands with blood colored hands and a heavy heart. 

She lightly nudges Gavin's barely awake body with her foot. "Don't you dare try to stand, kid. I'll shoot your other leg if you do." Gavin groans, which Jack takes as an okay. 

She goes back to the bathroom and puts the First Aid Kit back, washing her hands viciously before leaving. (She can still feel the blood on her hands, no matter how hard she washes her hands.)

Ryan finishes counting as she gets back. Ryan casually announces their dollar amount. "If my counting is correct, which it usually is, our take is 250 thousand dollars. And some change, but whatever." 

Geoff chokes on his beer, "HOLY SHIT."

"Goddamn, dude," Michael murmurs, agreeing with Geoff. 

Gavin's sitting up now, instead half-asleep. "250 thousand. Holy fuck." He intones, staring out in front of him.

"I could buy like, so much soda, now!" Ray grins, sipping on a water bottle. The crew breaks out in giggles. Geoff chuckles and gets up to make dinner. Jack joins him as the rest of the crew chatters excitedly. 

An hour later, they toast to the success of their first heist. “To more successful heists!” This is just the beginning.

(Oh, but the end always comes.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> did u kno: isis hates editing her own writing because it's awfullllllllll. seriously writing is pretty fun sometimes, but when i have to edit this shit i just hATE IT SO MUCH. sorry if the pov is fucked, i'm running on like four hours of restless sleep.
> 
> oh yeah, so there'll be two chapters in this. this chapter: the first heist. the next: the last heist. this fic is the final fic in the series (or at least it SHOULD be) i'm guessing the last part should be done around mid-august, but don't hold me to that. okay bye thanks for reading <3


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